Looking for Eternity

Both Troy and I got full knee repIacements in late 2020…..(Yes, I guess we are officially old now) So as a reward, we bought new E Bikes. We are making choices to actively live again!

On 10/30/17 when Jadyn ran off to heaven ahead of us, we wanted to shut it all down, and hide. We felt destroyed after years of praying for her healing.

And since then we have been building new skin as we take steps forward. Jesus is renewing our broken hearts as we work through our crippling grief. It really has been an amazing and yet difficult transformation.

God’s Word talks about transformation of something old made new, and also resurrecting death to life. Here are a few Scriptures about miraculous changes…

2 Corinthians 5:17–Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

Ezekiel 36:26–And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.

Romans 12:2–Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.

Philippians 1:6–And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.

Jeremiah 32:38-40–And they shall be my people, and I will be their God.I will give them one heart and one way, that they may fear me forever, for their own good and the good of their children after them. I will make with them an everlasting covenant, that I will not turn away from doing good to them.

The ultimate comfort comes in giving Jesus our shattered hearts and choosing to believe His promise of eternal life. You see, this is not our home! Our hearts are set on heaven where Jadyn is with Jesus waiting for us. That we believe with our whole heart…

Though never easy, it is all we have to lean on. Yes, we miss Jadyn terribly, but she would not want us to freeze in time after her traumatic loss at the age of 18. This “new skin” is really the power and strength that Jesus is giving us through the Holy Spirit to fulfill our journey home to heaven.

Blessings my sweet friends, Kristin

(BTW we are also sizing down to a little ranch so we don’t have to replace the other knees for awhile!!!)

Today is the shortest day of the year and I plan to celebrate it because that means we will be slowly moving towards longer, lighter days!!!   The nights have been sooo dark, sooo early (at least in Chicago).   Not great for anyone, especially during a Pandemic.  Every December I need to remind myself that His (Jesus’) light shines brightest in the darkness!      I’m not sure that even if I had the power to, I would drag Jadyn back to this dark, broken world.   She ONLY experiences pure and stunning light now!  

I decorate my house with white lights.  I need reminders that…..“The Light shines in the darkness and the darkness will not overcome it.”~John 1:5    Jesus was born to die and bring the dead to life.  He came to conquer death and I have a confident hope that I will spend eternity with Him and my sweet girl☀️💜.    So take heart, He has overcome the darkness!!! Lighter and longer days are to come…..(both now and in eternity) Whatever 2021 brings, God is bigger…

Wow has 2020 been full of difficulties for everyone, to say the least!!! On a personal level we have entered the hardest season of the year. We are on a countdown to the end of the month and JJ being in Heaven for 3 years now(still hard to fathom some days)…..

The other night as I was remembering some very painful things from 3 years ago, God gave me a picture of Jadyn belly laughing in my mind! I held onto that picture the entire night and into the next day. I will continue to hold this picture in my mind as we move thru this season. Because this is what Joy looks like….this is what Heaven looks like to me!

My verse for the season is Colossians 1:11 in the Message Paraphrase…..I hope you can also find comfort in this verse as it is a difficult season for soooo many!

To our firecracker in the sky! Happy 21st Birthday Jadyn. We love you and miss you.

I thought I had learned this lesson a few years ago when Jadyn left, but apparently I need a refresher!!! I HAVE NO REAL CONTROL OVER LIFE OR DEATH or much else for that matter……God is reminding me of this yet again. I found this hand written card of Jadyn’s while going through her things recently. Instead of keeping my eyes fixed on what is wrong, what is frustrating, what is causing fear and divisiveness, we are called to “keep our eyes on what is true, what is lovely, what is excellent and worthy of praise.” HUGE challenge right now isn’t it?

As the COVID 19 ordeal goes on longer and longer, the tension becoming palpable, I’m finding it harder to find peace. I listened to a podcast yesterday centered around this Bible verse……”You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are FIXED on you”-Isaiah 26:3…..I now have this written on a card next to my bed and read it several times before “trying” to go to sleep. (key word “trying”) I am writing these words for myself as much as anyone else!!!!! Blessings and Love, Kristin (Lets keep our eyes fixed upward)

Amazing song for you…

The list keeping growing longer each week of new friends who have children joining Jadyn in heaven with Jesus. For all of you who have joined our club, this song is for you…

I’m sitting in a Starbucks sipping my “fall” drink and i find myself looking out at the chilly grey day reflecting on the past 2 years. It seems like forever ago and just yesterday that Jadyn ran ahead to Heaven🙏. I miss that crazy girl of mine as much as ever, but God has been faithful as He slowly pieces together my shattered heart💔. i don’t expect that it will look anything like my old unshattered heart, but the cracks (and there are many), are where He allows the light to shine both inward and outward. I have spent sooo much time looking for that light in the darkness…because it has been a long, dark journey. The video below was played at JJ’s memorial service. Listen to the song……Jesus STILL and always will make the darkness “Tremble”……..” He is light and in Him there is no darkness AT ALL”  1 John 1:5

“God has called Jadyn out of the darkness into His marvelous light”……I Peter 2:9

Watch and listen………

Today is Jadyn’s 20th birthday being celebrated in Heaven💜.   Here on earth she is forever18.    These pictures were all taken 2 years ago on our last trip to California with our family. We find ourselves here again getting tanner settled for grad school.  They both always wanted to be out here!!!  Jadyn is with us in spirit🙏.  

As I gaze at the ocean, flowers, hummingbirds and blue sky i know that she lives in a place that makes this pale in comparison(Paradise)

🥰Happy Heavenly birthday sweet girl😘😘😘

“You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.” Psalm 16:11

Hey my sweet J…   It is our second Easter without you here on earth.  I miss you as much as ever!   I can’t help but thinking that you would be coming home from your first year of college soon, all grown up and as funny as ever……. Just in time for your brother’s college graduation in May.  Time and the work that grief requires (which is oh so much) has softened the pain some, but your absence still takes my breath away sometimes.

I have been involved and surrounded by LOTS of hard stories and circumstances lately……depression, divorce, suicide, anxiety, serious illness and the list goes on. God has graciously allowed me to encourage and bless others with our story. There is a tiny part of me that is glad you aren’t having to experience any of this broken world, because you only see beauty, love, joy, peace and kindness now! A dear friend recently pointed out that you are probably up in Heaven cheering me on saying, “U go mom, u got this”!!! That made me smile because I can truly envision it…..

I was just reading the story of Jesus raising His close buddy Lazarus from the dead. Although He wept and was broken-hearted, still He had the power to resurrect Lazarus back to life. His words right before the miracle in John 11:25,26………”I am the resurrection and the life. Anyone who believes in me will live, even after dying. Everyone who lives in me and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” I do believe this and I know you do too Jadyn!

Easter reminds me that you are resurrected, restored, redeemed and revived to life eternal just as Jesus is. That gives me comfort and hope like nothing else can💜.

So enjoy Easter in Paradise as we anxiously await joining you one day!!!

luv u girl😘